Social Media

You know the thing about social media, it feels like everything is a competition. Maybe I havent posted in a while, the moment I do it felt weird. I kept checking my number of likes, afraid that people wont actually like my post and afraid that this post will lose out to my older posts in terms of likes. Its so superficial I feel so, disgusted by myself. My instagram is a place where I dont showcase my real life, like what I really am, who I really am. Its weird how it shows fragments of what I am, yet isnt representative of who I am. Its such a weird feeling and combination, I feel like quitting social media but, does that mean the end of my social life? The answer is yes. Because you cant keep up with trends, you're kept out of the loop, You can't join in conversations, nor find interesting common topics. Its horrible to know that people gossip as a form of socialising. I dont like it but I still do it. Why? Because I want to be kept in the loop.
Disgusting. I am so disgusting. Its so shallow yet I still do it.